Author: AWARE Media

Make Care Count: Irene’s caregiving story

“It doesn’t look like work when you’re in the outside looking in. But we’re working.”

Irene Law Kah Tin, 63, is a caregiver to her 88-year-old father, who has early signs of dementia and suffers from incontinence. In some ways, Irene is lucky—her boss allows her a flexible work arrangement, affording her time to spend with her dad. But his caregiving bills add up every month: $500 for two (heavily subsidised) care associates, $100 for diapers, over $100 in power, expensive taxi rides. Irene asks, how can encourage caregivers to speak up about their challenges and needs?

#MakeCareCount is an AWARE campaign to support and bring recognition to the unpaid, full-time work of family caregivers. AWARE is a member of Singapore Alliance of Women in Ageing, alongside Singapore Council of Women’s Organisations (SCWO), Tsao Foundation and Singapore Muslim Women’s Association (PPIS).

Thank you to Coromandel Productions for producing this video with us!

A Recap: Birds & Bees January Workshop for Parents

Written by Rachel Lee, AWARE intern

Don’t be salty if you missed this workshop, parents.

“Salty”? Yeah, it means “upset” in slang these days.

A pop quiz consisting of slang used by today’s teens was a highlight of the experiential workshop Birds & Bees, held at AWARE Centre on the morning of Saturday, 19 January 2019. For most of the 14 participants, the terms covered were eye-opening: “Netflix and chill”, for example, caught people off guard with its less-than-innocuous figurative meaning.

Birds & Bees is a new AWARE workshop series to help parents sustain important conversations about sex with their children in a non-judgmental way. Over the course of three hours, parents use case-studies, role-play and facilitated discussions to reflect on their values and sexual health knowledge, and improve communication with their children.

So how do we start a conversation about sex with our children? Do we just sit them down and launch into “the talk”?

Birds & Bees trainer Tan Joo Hymn emphasises that listening is just as important as speaking in these situations. After all, in AWARE’s 2018 survey on youth perceptions, 70 percent of youths who responded did not know if their parents were interested in their thoughts on sexual matters, or believed their parents to be rarely interested in the subject—a notion that, judging by interest in this workshop, is not true.

Joo Hymn also stressed that going in without preconceived notions was essential: “It is important to listen with an open mind, because what’s the point of listening if you have already made up your mind?”

To demonstrate these tenets, workshop participants paired up and took turns playing a listener and a speaker. Their takeaways drove home the point: If someone was listening with their full attention, it made the speaker want to share more; the listener could also feel the emotions behind his or her partner’s words. Conversely, not listening with full attention made the speaker frustrated and unwilling to share more. If parents find it hard to have a conversation with their children, therefore, they may need to reflect on their own behaviour and unconscious signals.

Another tip from Joo Hymn: Parents can try to create opportunities that naturally lead to having these conversations. A suggestion by Joo Hymn was for parents to leave relevant educational materials around the house, which may spark curiosity in children and start the conversation going.

The workshop ended off with case study discussions, during which an extremely important point was raised: “A lot [of attention is placed] on keeping our daughters safe, but more should be on teaching our children not to harass people,” said Joo Hymn. In other words, by having these important conversations early, parents can not just teach their children safety, but teach their children to behave with respect and compassion, too.

Chye Shu Wen, a 28-year-old participant of the workshop, said afterwards, “It was refreshing and nice to see parents with children of different ages at the workshop, as it takes initiative for parents to come.” Shu Wen herself is not a parent, but has young siblings on the cusp of puberty, and wants to apply the lessons learned at Birds & Bees to them.

Ultimately, taking an interest in workshop like this one is the first step to good parental communication.

Preventing the Second Wave of Trauma: the power of first response in supporting sexual assault survivors

 

“Why didn’t you say no? Why didn’t you fight back? But what were you wearing?”

One experience of sexual assault is one experience too many. We may not always know the right words to say, but we can all agree that sexual assault should never happen to anyone. One way to show zero tolerance for sexual assault is through our own words and actions.

Sexual violence can be a deeply traumatic experience, and how we respond to a disclosure is crucial to a survivor’s recovery. Based on experiences of Sexual Assault Care Centre (SACC) clients, survivors often lack support when they speak to family, friends, colleagues and official bodies about their experience. This can result in survivors internalising their feelings of shame and guilt (i.e. further subjecting survivors to possible secondary trauma), though the assault is never their fault.

To build a culture of support for those who have survived sexual violence, SACC is organising a Sexual Assault First Responder Training to help familiarise participants with trauma reactions and symptoms to better contribute to a survivor’s well-being. In this workshop, SACC will share more on the following:

1. Definition of sexual assault and harassment
2. Recognising Singapore’s legal framework
3. Understanding consent
4. Understanding the impact of sexual assault and trauma on survivors
5. Role of a sexual assault first responder
6. Providing support to survivors of sexual assault
7. Resources available for help
8. Key skills such as ensuring safety, active listening and empathy

As part of our Aim for Zero campaign, SACC is offering this workshop at a highly discounted price. Here, you will learn how to use the power of your words and actions to prevent the second wave of trauma for survivors. Details are as follows:

When: 2 February 2019, 10 a.m. – 2 p.m. [4 hours]
Where: AWARE Centre, 5 Dover Crescent #01-22, S(130005)
Who should attend: Social sector professionals, or students above 16 years old studying a relevant discipline (e.g. psychology, counselling, social work etc.)
Cost: $5 (Lunch will be provided)

Slots for this workshop are limited to the first 20 sign-ups only. A second round of the workshop will be organised should there be an overwhelming response. Persons of all genders and nationalities are more than welcome to attend.

We strongly request that all participants commit to the full duration of the 4-hour workshop to ensure that everyone will get the opportunity to engage in interactive role-play sessions and learn useful skills.

Note: For participants who are unable to pay the sign-up fee, please contact Natasha at sacc-engagement@aware.org.sg to request a waiver.

This session is now full! Register your interest in attending future sessions here.

A Recap: The Untold History of Singapore’s Indian Women

Written by Nanthini d/o T Sambanthan, AWARE intern

On the evening of Wednesday, 16 January, AWARE had the privilege of hosting “The Untold History of Singapore’s Indian Women”, a talk by Constance Singam, former AWARE President and civil rights activist. The sold-out talk was moderated by Ranjana Raghunathan, a former AWARE board member and doctoral candidate whose thesis explores marriage in the Singaporean Indian community.

Born in Singapore before WWII, Constance has witnessed a significant part of the nation’s history. Her accomplishments as an activist, specifically in women’s rights, migrant worker rights and race relations, have cemented her place as a leader in Singapore’s civil society. As an Indian-Singaporean woman herself, she told the crowd, this topic was deeply personal and one that she hoped the audience would further explore themselves. Early Chinese-Singaporeans—such as the writer Janet Lim—recorded their history, to the benefit of academics. Yet large gaps remain on the subject of early Indian-Singaporeans, and even less exists about early Indian women in Singapore.

Constance began her talk with the idea of stereotypes: how they can form based on misrepresentations and then linger on in the collective consciousness. Bringing up the stereotype that Indians are lazier than Chinese people, which dates back to early Singapore history, she noted that its roots lay in the supposed lack of productivity of the Indian coolie versus the Chinese coolie. In fact, however, “unlike the Chinese coolies who were employed and so paid by the amount they collected, the Indian coolies were at that time indentured servants and not paid.”

A major theme of the talk was how the various phases of migration to the region shaped the legacy of the Indian community in Singapore. Of the early migrants, Constance explained, the men were political prisoners, while the women were criminals who had been convicted of capital crimes such as murder and infanticide. She estimated that the British brought 25,000 such convicts to the Straits Settlements (i.e. modern-day Singapore, Malacca, Penang and Dinding) in the 19th century. Later waves of Indian migrants in the mid-to-late 1800s arrived not as convicts, but as economic migrants. Most of the migrants of these latter waves came from Tamil Nadu and Kerala.

Out of this population, only 10 percent were women—reflecting a gender disparity that continued well into the 20th century. Constance posited a reason for this: the fact that many Indian migrants regarded Singapore as a place for economic opportunity, but not a place to bring and raise a family.

The lack of historical records led Constance to examine fictional representations of Indians under British colonial rule, in books such as 1930’s The Soul of Malaya by Henri Fauconnier. These fictional accounts reflect the reality of the average Tamil woman living and working in the large British-owned plantations of colonial Singapore, Constance said: a life of frequent exploitation by plantation owners. The phrase “sleeping dictionaries”, she suggested, reflects how British men viewed these women—as objects for sex and for learning Tamil.

Indian women’s lack of independence and agency changed drastically during World War II. Constance shared a photo of the all-female Rani of Jhansi regiment. Named after Lakshmibai, a famous Indian queen who fought against the British in the late 1800s, and founded by controversial Indian independence leader Subhas Chandra Bose, it was formed in Singapore in 1943 as part of the Indian National Army. Trained as soldiers and led by Captain Lakshmi Swaminathan (later Lakshmi Sahgal), this regiment marched to Burma, although the tide of the war would later prevent them from seeing actual combat. According to Constance, the regiment instilled a certain amount of self-confidence in its women—especially middle-class women such as Rasamma Bhupalan, who would go on to be the principal of the Methodist Girls School Kuala Lumpur and a prominent member of Malaysia’s National Council of Women’s Organisation.

Other prominent Indian women referenced by Constance included Shirin Fozdar, the driving force behind the Women’s Charter, Khatijun Nissa Siraj, who led the formation of the Singapore Syariah Court to protect Muslim women, as well as Ellice Handy, the first Asian principal of the Methodist Girls’ School and author of My Favourite Recipes (which Constance endorses).

Constance and Ranjana opened the second half of the event up to the floor, and a vibrant discussion ensued on topics ranging from mental health to the legacy of the caste system (which, Ranjana pointed out, doesn’t factor into everyday life for most Singaporeans except during discussions of marriage and children). The diversity of the Indian community in Singapore was a topic that was returned to over and over again—the fact that in Singapore, several ethnicities, faiths and castes co-exist. For Constance, this heterogeneity was the result of the ability of Indians to travel back and forth freely from Singapore to India, unlike the Chinese, unable to return to their homeland due to the civil strife in China from the late 19th to the 20th century.

Several attendees also emphasised the attention that should be paid to working-class Indians, not just the educated elite. Taahira, an audience member, brought up her mother and grandmother who had been selling spices in the market for over 50 years; they had to learn Mandarin, Malay and Hokkien in order to better interact with their customers. Their legacies, she said, have affected her own life, and this talk was an opportunity for her to learn about the “breadth and depth of Indian women”, as previously she had only heard personal anecdotes.

“Seeing the pictures of the various women, I feel my history is cool,” said Taahira. “To hear Constance Singam talk was to be reminded of the past that I wasn’t born in and the past I could be a part of.”

20-year old sociology student Divya told me that attending the talk made her realise that her feelings of alienation in her own country were not unique. “Something I could really relate to was that a lot of Singaporean Indian women have this problem—they don’t fit in. I’ve always felt that, growing up… I didn’t make an effort to assimilate better,” she said. The knowledge that she wasn’t alone was “comforting”, but it also inspired her to do better: “I realise I have a lot of privileges that my mum and grandparents didn’t have, so it’s my responsibility to use my privilege to change things.”

For the non-Indian members of the audience, the talk was also eye-opening. I spoke to Tina, a Chinese attendee. “As a Chinese, I don’t get to interact enough with the other communities,” she said. “This was a chance to hear them talk about themselves.”

At the end of the talk, Ranjana reminded the audience that “minorities have to claim their right to a nation.” For Constance, this means that Singaporean Indians “have to do our own work” to make ourselves continually “relevant” in Singapore’s diverse culture.

Budget 2019: AWARE calls for a ‘4G’ budget for all generations

This post was originally published as a press release on 11 January 2019. 

Gender equality group AWARE submitted its ninth annual set of recommendations for the national Budget via public consultation platform REACH this morning.

Taking a wide-ranging and comprehensive approach, AWARE designed this year’s recommendations to cover Singapore’s ‘4G’, or four generations – the grandparent, parent, children and future generations – with targeted interventions today addressing each of their needs tomorrow.

With the effects of Singapore’s ageing population in full swing, and total fertility rates continuing to decline, AWARE has dedicated recent efforts to examining the vicious cycle of intergenerational dependence created by current caregiving circumstances. When caregivers are forced to give up paid work in order to provide care for their families, they forgo opportunities to build adequate retirement savings, and have to depend on their descendants to care for them as they age. Those most adversely affected by this cycle are women (as family caregiving tends to fall to adult daughters or daughters-in-law) and low-income persons (for whom the financial burdens of unpaid caregiving loom proportionately larger). Interventions to ensure the financial security of caregivers therefore need to start earlier, before these groups age into poverty.

“There is an urgent need to build long-lasting support structures in the realm of caregiving, as those currently in place are proving imperfect,” said Shailey Hingorani, AWARE’s Head of Advocacy and Research. “The measures that 4G leaders take now may be able to dismantle systems of inequality—or may inadvertently uphold those systems for generations to come.”

“Our recommendations take into account all Singaporeans, but we urge consideration to be placed on women and low-income people in particular, as the challenges of caregiving—and ageing in general—are not gender-neutral, nor do they affect all socio-economic classes equally.”

AWARE’s recommendations harness the resources of Singapore’s existing population to put sustainable care infrastructures in place for the future. Here is an overview of the recommendations pertaining to each generation.

For 1G (Grandparents): Universal Healthcare System

  • Extending the Pioneer Generation Package to all persons upon their reaching age 65, to augment Singaporeans’ current reliance on CPF and other limited schemes
  • Making premiums for CareShield Life gender-neutral, instead of gender-differentiated, to make up for the relatively poor financial situation of women

For 2G (Parents): Direct Financial Support for Caregiving Work

  • Implementing a matched savings scheme for women aged 30-55 who have not yet achieved half the Basic Retirement Sum (matching would end once the Basic Retirement Sum is reached)
  • Providing a Caregivers’ allowance (a combination of CPF and cash), with amounts based on the salaries of paid caregivers, and varying according to the number of Activities of Daily Living that care recipients require assistance with
  • Establishing a national database of caregivers: to track caregiver numbers in Singapore, disseminate information on caregiver training and incentives, and facilitate healthcare appointments

For 3G (Children): Free Childcare for the Low-Income

  • Allowing all lower-income households to access subsidised childcare for free (regardless of mothers’ employment status), to boost early development and put every child on an equal footing

For 4G (Future): Progressive Taxation and Redistribution

  • Introducing more progressive forms of taxation, including wealth tax (e.g. estate duty, capital gains tax), and higher personal income tax, to create a fairer society in the long run

More details can be found in our full submission. Recommendations that we have made for the National Budget in recent years can be found on our website: 20182017201620152014.

Mark women’s contributions for Singapore bicentennial

This letter was first published by the Straits Times on 9 January 2019.

It is a pity that the Singapore Bicentennial Office (SBO) did not include at least one woman when they decided to erect statues of other pioneers of Singapore to stand alongside the statues of Sir Stamford Raffles (Four S’pore pioneers join Raffles in bicentennial project; Jan 5).

One woman who could have been considered is Hajjah Fatimah Sulaiman, who was a successful merchant and philanthropist.

Before Raffles had taken his first step onto Singapore soil, Hajjah Fatimah was already running a thriving trading business.

In the 1840s, she donated land and money for the construction of a mosque in Kampong Glam, which was named after her and gazetted as a national monument in 1973.

She also built homes for the needy.

Hajjah Fatimah was an early example of a woman who made significant contributions to Singapore.

There were many others, and I hope that their contributions will be acknowledged and celebrated.

The Singapore Women’s Hall of Fame was set up in 2014 to recognise these achievements and share their stories, and has currently inducted a total of 152 outstanding women.

The SBO could visit the Singapore Women’s Hall of Fame and consider how some of the women listed on the website could be included in its celebration of Singapore’s history.

Margaret Thomas (Ms)

President

AWARE

Employee or independent contractor – law needs to be clear

This letter was first published by the Straits Times on 4 January 2019.

The recent case in which the Central Provident Fund (CPF) Board applied to recover nearly $417,000 in alleged CPF arrears from Jurong Country Club highlights the highly unsatisfactory state of the current legal distinction between employees and independent contractors (Judge rejects CPF Board’s bid to recover $417k in alleged arrears; Dec 25, 2018).

District Judge Jasbendar Kaur said that an inquiry into whether a person is an employee or independent contractor has to be fact-based, where a multi-faceted test is applied.

The complexity of this legal test is unsatisfactory as it means that in many cases where workers are in less-structured working arrangements, parties are not able to say if the worker should be legally treated as an employee or independent contractor.

We have encountered this question in our work with low-income women engaged in part-time work.

For example, are cleaners who come in on a part-time but regular basis independent contractors or part-time employees?

What about child minders who come in on an ad hoc basis?

We tried to ask CPF and the Ministry of Manpower for advice, but they found it difficult to give a definitive answer due to the complexity of the legal test.

This uncertainty makes it difficult for employers to do the right thing and, from our experience, some employers do take advantage of such situations to deny workers their rights.

This law needs to be reviewed urgently, given the sharp rise in gig contracts in the new economy.

In doing this, we should keep in view the need to promote practices that are fair to low-income workers.

If the Government prefers not to change the current legal test, it can consider providing that, regardless of type of work contract, people who work a certain number of hours per month must be given CPF contributions and have certain other rights such as annual leave.

Corinna Lim (Ms)

Executive director

AWARE

Talk: The Untold History of Singapore’s Indian Women

You are invited to attend a talk by Constance Singam, activist, author and former AWARE president, on the untold story of Singapore’s Indian women.

‘Little has been documented about the history of women in Singapore, and even less has been said about our Indian women.

Did you know, for instance, that in the early years of the migration of people from India to Singapore, for every 100 men there were just 10 women? This ratio did improve, but even in the second decade of the 20th century, there were fewer than 200 women for every 1,000 Indian men in Singapore. This stark difference in the male and female numbers raises many questions–as does the fact that the early Indians were convicts and indentured labourers.

What was life like for the Indian women in early Singapore? Does their early history influence Singaporean attitudes towards more recent Indian workers, especially women workers?

I am interested in exploring the history of Indian women in Singapore, and in expanding our knowledge and understanding of what their lives were like.’

– Constance Singam 

Please join us for an illuminating presentation of a lost chapter of Singaporean history. Attendance is free.

Date: 16 January, 2019 (Wednesday)
Time: 7 p.m. – 9 p.m. (2 hours)
Venue: AWARE Centre (5 Dover Crescent #01-22)

Registration is now closed. Thank you for your interest! To be placed on the waitlist, please email media@aware.org.sg with the subject line ‘Untold History Waitlist’.

Birds & Bees (19 January Workshop): Starting open conversations about sex, consent and relationships at home

How do you talk to your children about sex?

It’s a topic that many parents are happy to put off discussing for as long as possible. But what are the consequences of making home an environment where talks about physical intimacy are off-limits?

Birds & Bees is an experiential workshop for parents, run by parents, to help you start and sustain the important conversation about sex – in a non-judgmental way. No matter where you are in your parenting journey, this workshop will allow you to:

  • Understand the lasting, positive impact of talking to your children about sex and relationships
  • Introduce crucial information about consent, personal boundaries, and safety to your children
  • Talk openly about the difference between respectful, healthy relationships, and abusive, unhealthy relationships
  • Improve your communication with children on difficult or uncomfortable topics
  • Create a home where your children are not afraid of approaching you if they have questions or are troubled about a relationship or sexual encounter.

Through case studies, role-play and facilitated discussions, the workshop will give you a chance to think more deeply about your values and sexual health knowledge, and improve communication with your children.

Birds & Bees is a programme for all parents, though this particular workshop will deal with issues most relevant to parents of teenage children (12 to 18-year-olds).

Date: 19 January 2019 (Saturday)
Time: 10am – 1pm (3 hours)
Venue: AWARE Centre (5 Dover Crescent #01-22)

Register here!